Maybe you’ve been through Part One of my Working Mum Career Change ebook and you have a long list of your likes, dislikes and interests. You’re in touch with your vision for your life and how you’d like to work. Perhaps you even have a list (long or short) of contender careers. But you’re uncertain of the next steps. You could even be a multi-passionate person, full of ideas but not sure which one is best or how to proceed. After being unhappy in your career for so long, you feel under pressure to make the right decision. You don’t want to waste your time or jeopardise your family’s happiness by making the wrong choice.
For some people this is when the reality of a career change sets in. It’s good fun getting to know yourself and doing self-discovery exercises but acting upon that knowledge and making a choice can be scary. This is the point when a lot of career changers throw their hands up in the air and say “It’s too hard. I’ll go with what I know.”
Here’s my advice to you if you find yourself in this situation:
Don’t panic
Easy for me to say but don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Yes this is an important decision but you’ve made important decisions before. Trust in yourself and know you can do this.
Take your time
You’ve been unhappy in your career for this long, a little longer while you make the right decision is not going to hurt. Perhaps you feel under pressure by your family and friends, who keep asking you about your career change, and maybe you’re embarrassed that you’re not any further along? Tell them that you’re taking the time to get this right. In the meantime, be sure to take care of yourself and try to find some joy in your current situation, whether that’s listening to a new podcast on your way to work, taking a walk in the fresh air when it all gets too much or practicing mindfulness exercises to help you get through the day. When I was unhappy in my job, and working on my exit strategy, I had the serenity prayer pinned on my desk and looked at it frequently! Do whatever you need to do (without breaking any laws of course!)
Don’t make a choice
I know this sounds like a cop out but rather than committing to a choice, commit to exploring your options. Go out and meet people who are working in careers that interest you. Ask them about a typical day, how they got started, what’s enjoyable and what’s not so enjoyable. Thank them for their time and see if they can introduce you to someone else. You’ll be amazed at the clarity that these kind of informational interviews can give you and you may be making contacts that can help you in your future career. Just make sure to pay for the coffee before walking out of the café (Yes I forgot to do this once!)
Try things on for size
This goes a step further than informational interviews in that you could actually try a job (or something related to that job) on for size. Perhaps you can shadow someone for the day or if you’re interested in retraining as a physiotherapist, for example, you could try getting a part-time admin job in a physio’s office so you are around that kind of work all day, exposed to the industry and the terminology. You could even do a working holiday (and get away from the kids for a bit in the process). For example, if you’re interested in working with animals you could try a working holiday as a farm hand.
Work out your priorities
This is where all of your self-discovery work really pays off. You really need to know what is most important to you. What are the special talents and interests you want to feature most in your career? What kind of environment do you want to work in? What kind of environment will you absolutely not work in? Which of your values do you want to express most in your work? Then focus on careers that provide the best match for you.
Keep an open mind
At the same time keep an open mind. While a no-go area might be that you refuse to commute for more than an hour a day, you might be able to convince an employer (who is more than an hour away) to consider you working from home. Also, you might want to prepare yourself for the fact that your ideal career might not even exist yet or may need to be created by you! This means creating your own job description based on your priorities. When I graduated from university, life and career coaches barely existed, it certainly didn’t come up as an area to explore in the numerous online tests that I did back then. Now I find myself not only coaching, but coaching mums who are transitioning in their careers, within my own business. I started with my priorities and created my job description from there.
What’s the worst that can happen?
When it feels really hard and you’re scared of making a career decision or moving forward, ask yourself what’s the worst that can happen? Or even write it down. Write down all the terrible things that could happen if you get this wrong and then ask yourself is this really that awful and then think about how you can manage it? Most things that we spend time worrying about don’t actually happen (and this is coming from a lifelong worrier) anyway and, even if they do they are usually never as bad as we imagine them to be. But what’s the alternative? A lot of the time the worst decision is doing nothing at all.
Maintain perspective
Above all, maintain perspective. Career change is hard, it takes time and it really challenges you to look at yourself and what you’re doing in this world. But what’s really hard is spending the next twenty, thirty, however many years, unhappy and hating what you do.
I hope I’ve left you with some food for thought. If you’re struggling to make a decision in your career you can contact me for a free working mum SOS chat. 30 minutes – the time it takes to watch a really bad reality TV show – is all it takes to get you unstuck.