It is a universally acknowledged truth that having children is not good for a woman’s career.
First there’s maternity leave, then there’s the increased likelihood of returning to work part-time or in dumbed down work, so we can fit in our extra 9 hours of unpaid work and care compared to men each week.
Leaving aside the issue of discrimination in the workplace and lack of flexibility, a lot of women won’t put themselves forwards for promotion because they are worried about the impact this could have on home life. This ends up being a bit of a vicious cycle though with employers perceiving mothers as not being as committed to their careers.
Despite being a champion for all things women and work, I shy away from opportunities myself because I know it would be too disruptive at home. This morning I tried to make it to a 7am Pilates class and the house was in disarray; I shudder to think what would happen if I tried to work full-time in a normal job with a commute and everything (although I’m sure the extra money would be welcomed by all household members).
The latest “Status of Women Report Card” issued by the Australian Government shows that women experience a 55% drop in earnings for the 5 years following the birth of a child, compared to no change for men. Combine this with the gender pay gap (currently at 13.3% in Australia) it’s no wonder that women approaching retirement have 23.1% less superannuation than men of the same age.
I think we can all be agreed that it’s tough for working mums.
So you may be surprised when I say that having kids was the best thing that could have happened for my career.
Now I’m starting from a low base because for most of my twenties and thirties I was completely miserable at work. Working in professional services marketing, I was in a career and culture that didn’t suit me but, for some reason, despite having no real responsibilities, I stuck with it. Looking back I can see this was foolish but I didn’t have the maturity, life experience or perspective to see otherwise.
Cue motherhood, where suddenly you develop those traits in bucket loads.
When I returned to work, part-time of course, after having my first child I realised a few things:
- It was still shit.
- It was still shit but I was being paid less.
- I was being paid less but still trying to cram in the same amount of work and stress.
- Now I was feeling stress at home too and I was missing my babies.
- If I was going to go through all of that IT HAD TO BE WORTH IT
So I set about making a career change. This was not an easy process and it’s why I’m writing a book about mums and career change, but the end result was totally worth it.
Now I am in a career that I absolutely love, where I get to help others. I work in a culture that suits me and I am totally aligned with. It’s flexible. I can shift things around so I can get to my kids, activities and I work from home 3 days out of 5.
Would I have made this career change if it wasn’t for having kids?
I’m not sure but it might have taken longer. They were a catalyst.
Now I know I am in a position of privilege to be able to write this. Not all women will have a choice about changing career. Some will have to stick at jobs that make them miserable AND work full time AND be paid poorly. Then they will come home and do 5 hours more unpaid housework than their male partner, even if they are the primary breadwinner.
For me, having children was a catalyst for having a much better career than the one I had before. And through my research for my book, I’ve met a lot of women who would say the same. For me and these women, there is still much to improve but the ladder is leaning against the right wall. And that’s a good place to start.